A Teen Read: How Should You Dress to Honor God?

As a teen who wants to honor God, how should you dress?

Dressing cute? Totally fine. Being trendy? Also fine. Putting effort into your appearance and creating a style you enjoy? Great. In fact, aiming to look put together is probably wise (you don’t want to look like a slob!).

But here’s where it gets tricky: what about modesty?

The Dreaded Topic

Let’s be honest, modesty can feel like the worst topic ever. Everyone seems to have a different opinion about what counts as modest. Some people are super passionate about their standards, while others seem to care very little. On top of that, most teens don’t seem to value modesty at all, and it can feel awkward to stand out in your “modest” outfit that looks more like it belongs on a frumpy grandma (no offense, grandmas).

So what does modesty actually require of you?

Can you wear what your friends are wearing—especially if it’s not that bad compared to what the practically naked girls at the beach are wearing?

Is it wrong to want attention for looking good?

What even makes clothing immodest?

These are tough questions, but they’re worth thinking through—especially for Christian girls who take God’s Word seriously.

And before you assume this is about someone else, pause. It’s easy to read a post like this and picture a girl you know who dresses way more revealing than you do. But this isn’t about her—it’s about you. About making sure you understand what modesty is and how to live it out.

Why Modesty Matters

Let’s be clear from the start: modesty is not about making your mom or your pastor’s wife happy. It’s not about being more covered than everyone else. It’s not even about a set of rules that tell you what you can and can’t wear.

So what is modesty?

Modesty is a heart attitude—a way of thinking—that shows up in your choices, especially in how you present yourself. We’ll unpack that more in a minute. But first, let’s talk about why modesty matters.

There are many reasons, but one trumps them all–God commands it. 

1 Timothy 2:9–10 says, 

“…women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control… with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works.”

There are many principles we could pull from this passage, but on the most basic level, God clearly says that respectable clothing and modesty should characterize women who claim to be godly. That’s not a suggestion—it’s a command.

So here’s the real question: Do you want to be godly?

If your answer is “not really,” then yeah, modesty probably isn’t going to feel that important. But if your answer is “yes,” then you’ve got to treat modesty as a non-negotiable. Even before we talk about what it means—decide that you’re in.

Defining Modesty

If you’re ready to tackle this topic, let’s dig in.

I mentioned that modesty is a state of the heart—one that impacts how we present ourselves. That idea comes from verses like 1 Timothy 2:9 and 1 Peter 3:3–4. In Bible times, women often sought attention through flashy fashion—braided hair, gold, expensive clothes. But instead of focusing on outward beauty, those women were told to prioritize inner beauty: godliness and good works.

It’s the same for us. Yes, our culture is very different. (I doubt many of you are drawing attention with elaborate hair braiding.) But the heart issue is the same: craving attention and obsessing over appearance is the default for most women today.

So, as women who are trying to live by God’s Word and not by the culture’s pressure, we must start in the right place: our hearts. perhaps you could even break it up into 3 steps…

Step 1: Decide that you want God to get the attention more than you want it for yourself.

Step 2: Think through your clothing choices with that goal in mind.

Step 3: Move on. Don’t obsess over what you’re wearing or how you look (get your eyes off yourself). 

That’s a pretty solid recipe for biblical modesty: Desire to please God, make wise choices, and then move on to more important things!

But… What About the Specifics?

Let’s be real. You’re probably still wondering things like:

• “How short is too short?”
• “How low is too low?”
• “What about swimsuits?”

You probably know more than you’re willing to admit already—but it’s still worth thinking about. 

Here are 5 tips to help guide your clothing choices as a Christian girl who wants to honor God:

1. Start With Your Motives

When you’re picking an outfit, it might not seem like a big deal. You’re just getting dressed, right? But pause for a second and ask yourself what’s going on inside:
Are you hoping someone will notice you?
Are you thinking, “This will get their attention”?
Would you be okay telling a godly friend—or even your mom—why you chose that outfit?

It doesn’t matter if it’s for prom, a youth group bonfire, or just a Tuesday at school—what’s happening in your heart matters just as much as what ends up on your body.

Of course, we all want to be noticed sometimes. But when that desire starts steering your choices—especially toward immodesty—it’s time to stop and ask God for help. Ask Him to shift your focus:
“God, help me want Your approval more than theirs.”

That kind of quiet prayer might feel small, but it’s huge. No one else may see that heart check—but God will. And you better believe it brings Him joy.
It’s in those hidden moments that He shapes you into the woman He made you to be.

2. Don’t Rely on Rules

Rules might seem like they’d make modesty easier—but they usually don’t.

What looks fine on one girl might be completely inappropriate on another. Your body type matters. How you carry yourself matters. Even when and where you wear something can make a difference.

I had this exact conversation with my daughters about swimsuits recently. We talked about how the Bible doesn’t say, “Only wear one-pieces” (and let’s be honest, some one-pieces are far from modest!). Instead, we had to talk through what modesty looks like on each girl.

Sometimes events will set rules, and that can be helpful in creating a modest environment. But when it comes to your personal standard, don’t just follow a checklist. Instead ask:
Is God pleased with my pursuit of modesty—inside and out?

3. Don’t Dress to Attract Attention

Here’s the uncomfortable truth: modesty does have something to do with not intentionally drawing attention to your body.

Someday, in marriage, your husband will (and should) be attracted to your body. That’s a good thing. But there should be no one else you’re trying to have look at you that way. In fact, when guys are especially attracted to your body (outside of marriage), they are in sin. It’s called lust, and God takes it very seriously.

That means:

• Your private areas should stay private.
• Your body shouldn’t be on display.
• Your clothing shouldn’t invite temptation.

And yeah—this might feel hard sometimes.
It can be frustrating to see other girls getting attention for showing more, while you feel like you’re fading into the background. That’s where you remember: living for God often means looking different.

That might mean you even avoid things like tight leggings that highlight your behind. Or you reconsider the low tops that show cleavage, or the tight outfits that show every bump and curve. And maybe even the swimsuit that makes people think you are basically naked! (Yes, that deserved an exclamation point.)

These aren’t meant to be rules—they’re just practical wisdom for girls who want to honor God. That’s what modesty is really about: letting thoughtfulness, humility, and a desire to please the Lord guide your choices.

And when it comes to this specific aspect of modesty, remember: Lustful attention is not admiration—it’s someone else’s sin.

Even if it feels flattering, it’s not the kind of attention you want. God desires so much more for his daughters than being eye candy. In other words, save the alluring outfits for your husband!

4. Let God Set Your Standard

One of the hardest parts of modesty is feeling like the only one who cares. Everyone else seems to be wearing whatever they want—and sometimes, it’s not just random girls at school. It might be your sweet Christian friends. Maybe even girls you look up to.

But here’s the thing: they’re not the standard.

If your friends ate candy all day, would you assume that’s what healthy eating looks like? Of course not. Just because someone you respect wears something doesn’t automatically make it modest.

The only true and trustworthy standard is God’s Word. So when thoughts pop into your mind like:

• “But she’s godly and she wears it.”
• “Her mom says it’s fine.”
• “I’m the only one who can’t wear this.”

Stop yourself. And remember who you’re trying to please.

Modesty means choosing to look different sometimes. That might feel hard, but it’s also powerful. Your obedience might not turn heads—but it brings joy to the heart of God. And that’s worth more than any trend.

5. Decide Whose Attention You Want

Let’s be honest—you probably wouldn’t mind if the cool crowd noticed you. Or if a certain guy looked your way. That’s not necessarily bad. 

But here’s the danger: when that desire for attention starts to guide your decisions, especially how you dress, it can lead you somewhere you didn’t mean to go.

Even if your outfit isn’t revealing, are you still trying to get a certain kind of reaction? Are you thinking more about getting noticed than about honoring God?

Here’s the truth: the attention of your Creator is so much better than the attention of any guy.

1 Peter 3:3–4 says:

“Do not let your adorning be external… but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.”

Did you catch that? God looks at your quiet obedience—your inward beauty—and says, “That’s precious to Me.”

So take a moment and ask yourself:
Whose attention am I chasing? The world’s, or God’s?

Because when you choose to live for Him, modesty becomes less about rules and more about joy. You won’t be trying to push the limits anymore. You’ll be too focused on what actually matters.
And in eternity, you’ll be so glad you lived for what lasts.

Final Thoughts

Like I said from the beginning, it all comes down to one question: Do you want to please God?

That question applies to so many areas of life—your words, your relationships, your priorities. But don’t let yourself believe that your clothing doesn’t matter. It does.

When you choose modesty, you’re not just “following rules” or “being different.” You’re saying something with your life. You’re saying, “I belong to Jesus. I care more about what He thinks than what anyone else says.”

And if you’re a girl who professes godliness—it should show.

You don’t have to figure it all out perfectly. You don’t need to get it right every time. But if your desire is to honor God, start there.
Ask Him for wisdom.
Ask Him for courage.
Ask Him to help you be the kind of girl who points people to Him—not just by what you say, but by what you wear, how you carry yourself, and who you’re living for.

And as you take those small steps of obedience, know this:
He sees. He’s pleased. And He’s shaping you into someone truly beautiful.