Whether we state them as resolutions or not, most of us think through a few ways we’d like to improve each coming year. Among those goals…
Do you ever notice young couples on a date? Not only are they often overly affectionate, they are also quite chatty. They might be talking about life, just catching up, conversing about big issues, or expressing some of their hopes and dreams for the future. Whatever the topic is, they are talking.
This can be a sad contrast to the couple who’s been married for years and has little to talk about. You might see them together but they are just scrolling on their screens, or staring off in space, or lifelessly discussing logistics. No one wants to be that couple. Certainly none of us used to be (who starts a marriage with someone they don’t enjoy talking to?!)
But it’s easy to get a little lazy in our marriage. Tiredness takes over. Lackluster routines can become the norm. But regardless how far you’ve strayed from those early conversational days, it’s not too late to spark up some good conversation! And as Christians, we have a lot of important things to talk about. A lot of important topics truly worth talking about!
Talk About Important Things
If you are a Christian, there should be no stagnancy in who you are and what you are learning. You should be faithfully learning God’s word, constantly growing, and purposefully using your life for God’s purposes. That means you have a lot of really good stuff to talk about! And Lord willing, your spouse does to!
You can talk about what you read in the Bible each day. You can talk about what you are praying for. You can ask for accountability on something you are working on. You can ask your spouse what they are learning. You can discuss how to better disciple your kids, or better pray for your grandkids. You can discuss theological conundrums. You can share how you’re seeing God work around you.
Basically, through these conversations, you can apply Hebrews 10:24 in your marriage:
“And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works” – Hebrews 10:24
While this passage is referring to relationships within the local church, who better to stir up than the partner God gave you to do life with.
I would think every Christian is willing to admit good spiritual conversation sounds like a good idea. But it does take some effort, so let me remind you of 2 benefits.
First, and most obvious, this will push you in your relationship with God. Having someone so close to you know what you’re thinking through and working on will cause you to push yourself spiritually. Simply talking more frequently about spiritual matters will move you along. Both you and your spouse will be more eternally minded, more godly, and more effective for the kingdom by how you nudge each other forward in conversation.
Second, you will grow closer together as a couple. Marriages thrive when both spouses are seeking God together. Not to mention, marriages just do better when they are having meaningful conversations. Again, remember what knit you together in your early days — was it not in part due to connecting through words? It sounds so simple, but words are a window into our thoughts, and our thoughts are a huge part of who we are. And our thoughts about God and his word, are perhaps our deepest most profound and meaningful thoughts — exactly what we should be sharing with our spouse.
So let’s get talking…talking about anything and everything, and especially about the most important things!