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When Motherhood Feels Like A Duty

When Motherhood Feels Like a Duty

There are a lot of duties we don’t especially find joy in. But that is just life, right? From the moment we wake up, we complete task after task because… that is what we do. There is a lot to accomplish.

The problem is, sometimes that mindset can flow right into our parenting, and if we are not careful we even deem motherhood a joyless job.

I doubt many of us maintain this gloomy attitude for long, but there are those days or even just hours, that creep up on us here or there. Where they come from, who knows? It could be some womanly hormones messing with our emotions. Or maybe it’s some discouraging thoughts that have been left unchecked. Maybe we have bought into some worldly messages about what life is “supposed” to be like, and now there’s the realization that our life isn’t matching the “ideal.” Whatever the reason, there is a cure.

Finding the Joy

The remedy to a negative (or just “blah”) attitude about your job as a mom is to remember the truth. The truth is your children are a gift from God to you. They are not just another task to take care of, and they are certainly not a barrier to the “ideal life.”

Psalm 127:3 says, “Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them!” 

We need to remind ourselves that children are a blessing from God, especially on those days in which we are merely going through the motions. This alone will go a long way in helping us see our parenting as a privilege rather than a mere duty.

Get a Little Sentimental

We ought to take a little time to stop and think about these God-given gifts. Too often we find ourselves busy about our day and we view our children as interruptions to our “to-do list.” Stop for a moment and notice their cute little features, smile at their little giggle, chuckle at their mispronunciation of words, watch their developing abilities, notice their growing thought process… just stop and pay attention to them for a couple minutes.

As difficult as they sometimes are, God has made them with precious personalities, unique dispositions, and huggable little bodies.  Slow down and intentionally enjoy them as you go about your day – because if they are a gift, you better believe God wants you to enjoy them!

Fight for Perspective

Another way we can fight the gloomies (yep, I just made that word up), is to picture one of your little gifts being taken away from you. It doesn’t take much imagination to know you would be devastated if you lost a child (even the most difficult of them!). What should that tell us? It should remind us that these little people are tremendous blessings to be cherished even on the hardest of days. They are always worth the work they take. Every task of motherhood may not be delightful, but the essence of motherhood is. Just the fact that you have your children should bring you joy.Parenting may be hard, but children are always worth the work they take. Click To Tweet

Remember, motherhood is not a duty we need to fulfill because “it’s what we got to do.” It is a privilege and a blessing. There are a variety of ways we can find joy in this job; so shake off the “blah” attitude and start by just paying attention to the unique children God has entrusted into your care. Thank God that you have them. Then watch the motherhood gloomies start to melt away.


Prayer 4 the Gloomy Mom

Lord, thank you for the blessing of my children. I know many people don’t get to experience being a mother, and sadly many people are robbed of the joy because they’ve believed the lie that children are merely inconveniences. 

May I never think of my children in those terms. Instead, may I turn to you in praise and thanksgiving as I spend time with my children, appreciate them, and do life with them. May I notice how precious they are. Help me be more grateful for their unique qualities. 

Thank you God for my little arrows!


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